This is the hardest part: saying goodbye to these friends that I have made! :'( I have gotten to know so many wonderful people here, who have become actual friends, that it will be difficult to leave, having very little guarantee that I will see them again! One of the great things about traveling over the last semester is that I have realized the world is smaller than I thought. What I mean is, I never know when I will run into someone! Until then, Facebook and WeChat are great inventions!
I'm reminding myself to be still. At this point my brain is already focused on going back, and wondering about keeping up with Chinese when I go home. It is not productive to allow myself to be distracted by things that haven't even happened yet! This morning I listened to "It Is Well," by Kristene Dimarco, which just reminded me of the week before I came here. I was nervous about coming to a new country and throwing myself into a language I didn't understand. Well now I'm in the opposite position, getting used to "real life" again. This doesn't change the fact that the Father is COMPLETELY in control! He is not surprised by anything that will happen :) Now I will just have to wait and see!....
Monday, November 16, 2015
Wednesday, November 4, 2015
Serving the King
Not a lot of memorable things have happened this week, but I've still been busy. I've gotten to help teach English at another local school, similar to the school that I am attending. I really enjoy this kind of teaching, and it gives me a good idea for possible job ideas! I'm enjoying the last few weeks here in Yangshuo, and getting to hang out with some friends, in addition to studying. It's a bittersweet time because I'm leaving a place that I've become familiar with, and new friends I've gotten to know well.
On the other hand, I'd like to include some of the thoughts I've had toward the many people who have had a hand in training me in my beliefs throughout the years. In the three months I've been here in China, I have realized how important it is to know what I believe and why. Especially in college I focused on making my beliefs my own, not just something my parents taught me. I think this has helped me to maintain the security that I need when surrounded by so many different beliefs here. I am secure in who I am because I know that Christ lives in me. I can be confident that He is creating me into the person He wants me to be.
One of my friends the other day was having a hard time with some of her close relationships. A lot of things seemed to hit her all at the same time, and she mentioned to me that the Father must be testing her to see how she would react to all the horrible situations. I told her that God does not force us to make certain decisions, but does allows people to make their own choices. Another person I know said that if he were God, he would make everyone do what he wanted. I asked him if that was truly what he would want. He asked me what I meant, and I got to explain that forced obedience is not something that the Father would require, because He is loving, and wants us to want to serve Him. Not much came of that, but it made me realize that this is what I really believe! It's so important to be aware that I am serving the Father not out of obligation, but because I want to act out how much I love Him! It's a difficult concept to grasp here.
THANK YOU to those who have taught me throughout the years so that I can discover new things as I take each step toward where God has placed me!
On the other hand, I'd like to include some of the thoughts I've had toward the many people who have had a hand in training me in my beliefs throughout the years. In the three months I've been here in China, I have realized how important it is to know what I believe and why. Especially in college I focused on making my beliefs my own, not just something my parents taught me. I think this has helped me to maintain the security that I need when surrounded by so many different beliefs here. I am secure in who I am because I know that Christ lives in me. I can be confident that He is creating me into the person He wants me to be.
One of my friends the other day was having a hard time with some of her close relationships. A lot of things seemed to hit her all at the same time, and she mentioned to me that the Father must be testing her to see how she would react to all the horrible situations. I told her that God does not force us to make certain decisions, but does allows people to make their own choices. Another person I know said that if he were God, he would make everyone do what he wanted. I asked him if that was truly what he would want. He asked me what I meant, and I got to explain that forced obedience is not something that the Father would require, because He is loving, and wants us to want to serve Him. Not much came of that, but it made me realize that this is what I really believe! It's so important to be aware that I am serving the Father not out of obligation, but because I want to act out how much I love Him! It's a difficult concept to grasp here.
THANK YOU to those who have taught me throughout the years so that I can discover new things as I take each step toward where God has placed me!
Saturday, October 17, 2015
Loving myself
I've recently read an article by Allison Vesterfelt called, How to Find Love. This article is essentially teaching people how to love themselves.
Not just be okay with yourself, or tolerate yourself, but to find the reasoning behind poisoning thoughts and why they take root. The main point of this article is to capture my thoughts. This was extremely poignant for me, and definitely needed to be reminded Whose I am! Here are some points that I jotted down as I read the article. I've attached the link at the bottom.
- Loving myself ---"I acknowledge I'm not exactly where I want to be, but I accept myself fully and completely, just as I am."
- I am worthy of loving myself---once I get over the false humility that I don't deserve the Father's love, then I can actually experience true gratefulness!
- Let fear go--this is a big one for me. I feel so confident at times, but find myself leaning on my insecurities instead of the truth of who I am. "Our criticism of others is often the way that we see ourselves"
- I'm not perfect, but I don't need to be
- Change my thought patterns
- *get less busy. I actually starred this one because I almost told myself, "Ah, I can ignore this one." I know I probably need this one the most!
I felt this knot of worry in my gut---that I hadn't even known was there!---releasing as I realized the truth behind these words! Allison encourages us that the love we feel for ourself can stay with us, no matter what takes place in life! Before closing, let me note: I DONT BELIEVE ANY OF THIS IS PERMANENTLY POSSIBLE WITHOUT THE FATHER! Strong will is not enough to make permanent change unless He has control of your life! I hope this impacts you as much as it did me, and that you at least find one grain of truth that you can latch onto!
Tuesday, October 6, 2015
Just one of those days!
This has been a tough week...no particular reason, except that I'm pretty busy with full day classes. I'm learning (key here: IN THE MISDT OF LEARNING) how not to take things personally.
I know it's just one of those weeks, but I constantly am listening to my "encouraging" music and catching up online with Sunday stuff! This keeps me grounded, reminding myself that there really is a world outside of language school :)
Several of my friends here and especially back home have helped me a lot with encouraging words, whether or not they knew it. I had an instance today where I had to ask for help on my homework because nothing was landing in my brain! It was a fairly simple assignment, but one of the other students offered to help. He basically read through the entire thing with me, and I had to remind myself that I'm not helpless, even though I ask for help. These are just truths I'm reminding myself of daily. I think reminding myself whose I am will keep me ready for a time when someone else needs my help!
- I got into a debate with another classmate on the benefits of homework,
- haven't worked out as much as I would like, and feel like I've gained 20 pounds!
- just finished a complete day where my brain was mush, and
- I actually said half a sentence in Spanish during class (remember, I'm supposed to be learning Chinese)!
I know it's just one of those weeks, but I constantly am listening to my "encouraging" music and catching up online with Sunday stuff! This keeps me grounded, reminding myself that there really is a world outside of language school :)
Several of my friends here and especially back home have helped me a lot with encouraging words, whether or not they knew it. I had an instance today where I had to ask for help on my homework because nothing was landing in my brain! It was a fairly simple assignment, but one of the other students offered to help. He basically read through the entire thing with me, and I had to remind myself that I'm not helpless, even though I ask for help. These are just truths I'm reminding myself of daily. I think reminding myself whose I am will keep me ready for a time when someone else needs my help!
Wednesday, September 30, 2015
hilarious song!
My teacher showed this to me in class the other day! Besides the fact that this song is pretty funny/relevant to my life right now, they're also really good musicians!
Halfway point! And a visit from the Padres!
This weekend my parents came to see me!!! Here are some bullet point highlights:
In my attempt at conversations during travel to Hong Kong, I learned how important tones are! Thank you to my teachers! This is when I really appreciate what I've been learning in class!
Mom, dad and I didn't meet up the first night in Hong Kong, so I ended up staying in little hotel. However it had an awesome pillow and AC! One of the little kids on the street pointed and called me a foreigner, which I haven't heard too often in our little tourist town :)
I had an awesome day hanging out with family! That first night I got to swim some laps---soooo relaxing! I really miss swimming pools! This entire weekend I've gotten to read for fun and forget about studying for a little bit. I think I need that for some sort of sanity!
I got to ride my first motor scooter and show mom and dad some samples of Chinese cuisine. We even experienced a cooking class together! It was a great weekend!
This week I've really been enjoying listening to Dave Barnes and Nicole Nordeman. It reminds me to focus on the Lord, and not to be pressured by my own voice, which sometimes tries to convince me that I have to do everything perfectly.
I got to ride my first motor scooter and show mom and dad some samples of Chinese cuisine. We even experienced a cooking class together! It was a great weekend!
This week I've really been enjoying listening to Dave Barnes and Nicole Nordeman. It reminds me to focus on the Lord, and not to be pressured by my own voice, which sometimes tries to convince me that I have to do everything perfectly.
I have downloaded some sermons from previous series at church, which are really good as I'm trying to focus on hearing the Lord's voice in my life. I've really appreciated the prayers of my friends and family! It's great to keep up with everyone through FB and Instagram, etc. Here's my chosen song for the day!
Wednesday, September 23, 2015
Almost halfway!
The last couple weeks have been pretty eventful, yet routine at the same time. Each day I review a little before class, usually go to lunch with a couple friends, meet with my language partner in the evening, and hang out with friends in the evenings. On Wednesday nights they have basic salsa classes, and it's been awesome to practice with some Spanish music---makes me feel right at home! I've watched more soccer, football, and rugby in the last week than I have since the beginning of the year!
This last weekend, the English and Chinese schools went to the rice terraces, which we got to visit right before all the rice was harvested (within the next couple weeks). I felt like this was a great chance to practice what I've learned in Chinese. Little by little, right? I've put several pictures of the weekend on Facebook, and I've been told this last weekend was the best time to visit!
One of the new challenges: starting intensive classes, which simply means I am taking full day classes for the next few weeks. I love having a different teacher in the morning, and am definitely learning a lot with new classmates! There are soooo many new vocabulary words to learn, so I feel like I'm constantly reviewing. One of the new phrases we learned was from a movie that I watched as a kid, so connections like that help me to remember what I'm learning!
This weekend I'm going to get to see Mom and Dad, and I can't wait to play tour guide! It'll be great to see people from home, right in the middle of my China visit!
This last weekend, the English and Chinese schools went to the rice terraces, which we got to visit right before all the rice was harvested (within the next couple weeks). I felt like this was a great chance to practice what I've learned in Chinese. Little by little, right? I've put several pictures of the weekend on Facebook, and I've been told this last weekend was the best time to visit!
One of the new challenges: starting intensive classes, which simply means I am taking full day classes for the next few weeks. I love having a different teacher in the morning, and am definitely learning a lot with new classmates! There are soooo many new vocabulary words to learn, so I feel like I'm constantly reviewing. One of the new phrases we learned was from a movie that I watched as a kid, so connections like that help me to remember what I'm learning!
This weekend I'm going to get to see Mom and Dad, and I can't wait to play tour guide! It'll be great to see people from home, right in the middle of my China visit!
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